Doin' The Shamrock Shake!

Did you feel it? You may or may not have! A magnitude 4.7 4.4 earthquake rocked our world this morning at 6:25 a.m., centered in Westwood Encino, the largest quake felt in Southern California since the 1994 Northridge 2008 Chino Hills temblor.

The Militant was in his Compound, sleeping in his bed, and woke up at around 6-something a.m., realizing he'd slept through the night with the lights on and having forgotten to brush his teeth. So he brushed, shut the lights off, and went back to sleep, lying there as the morning sun was lighting up the sky, when he felt a brief but definitely noticeable shaking, which lasted but a few seconds.

The Militant, instinctively ready to waken up his trusted portable computing center (a.k.a. his lappytop) and scour Twitter for the initial magnitude and epicenter location, stopped himself short for a brief while before tweeting, "The Militant felt that." See, we've had a bunch of sub-4.0 quakes over the past few years, and The Militant hadn't even felt a single one. But he felt he could say more about today's tremor.

Then he realized today was St. Paddy's Day and quickly thought of any witty connections with the quake. Quake. Shake. Shamrock. YES!!!!  Consider it The Luck of The Irish (even though The Militant may or may not have any Celtic heritage of any percentage), but in the span of all but four minutes after el temblorito, he decided to tweet thus:

LOS ANGELES -- YOU CAN CALL THAT ONE A "SHAMROCK SHAKE." #StPatricksDay #Earthquake #YesTheMilitantFeltIt
— Militant Angeleno (@militantangleno) March 17, 2014

And the rest was history. #ShamrockShake it was. Top O'The Mornin' To You!

Though the day was mostly associated with KTLA's Chris Schauble and Megan Henderson ducking and covering (as every Los Angeles area native is taught in school -- one of the few things the LAUSD actually teaches you), media outlets everywhere went with the #ShamrockShake moniker for this morning's seismic event. Even KABC's most excellent Marc Brown mentioned not only the #ShamrockShake, but credited The Militant by name on the air!

Whoever named it the #ShamrockShake wins Twitter. You may now collect your prize.
— Marc Brown (@ABC7Marc) March 17, 2014

@militantangleno Not sure, but if I do i will give you the credit. Well-played, militant.
— Marc Brown (@ABC7Marc) March 17, 2014

It was aired on the 5 p.m. Eyewitness News newscast, which The Militant unfortunately missed, but others bore witness to the historic mention:

@militantangleno @ABC7 I believe the exact wording was "a twitter user who goes by the name of Militant Angeleno..." coined the term.
— Ted Rogers (@bikinginla) March 18, 2014

The Militant made his mark on society today. The world will never be the same. He also didn't feel any of the subsequent aftershocks. A 4.4. ain't no big deal, but he did feel that one. The Militant normally jokes that "No earthquake under a 5.0 is worth mentioning," but he may or may not have to lower that threshold. Where were you when you felt today's #ShamrockShake?

Uncommon Encino

The Militant drove through the Valley, taking the long way back to the compound (as in the surface streets as opposed to the freeway, because that's how the Militant rolls sometimes) and happened upon this shining gateway over Ventura Blvd (pictured left).

It reads: "ENCINO COMMONS - The Valley's Miracle Mile."

O RLY? First off, the Militant couldn't help but chuckle that this part of Los Angeles has taken upon itself to make a comparison to...another part of Los Angeles. Not that there's anything wrong with that, but an illuminated archway over one of the biggest thoroughfares in the area should herald something more grandiose - more original, perhaps? Heck, you might as well go all the way with the hyperbole.

Second, aside from having a landscaped median, there's ironically very little in common with A.W. Ross' (no, not that Ross, but this one) retail thoroughfare over the hill. There's no art museum, no iconic art deco architecture, in fact no art anything (okay, fine, so there's a Color Me Mine down the street). There's no print or broadcast entertainment media companies (though this family in the neighborhood makes the tabloids often), nor are there any sticky prehistoric fossils to be found (and no, this guy doesn't count). Miracle Mile, the Militant's ass!

Further Militant research revealed that this sign was no fluke - it was the work of a local Business Improvement District, which, the Real Miracle Mile doesn't even have (do they even need one if miracles happen there?).

Now, this isn't a gratuitous knock against the 818. The Militant actually digs certain parts of the SFV, and would rather live there than, say Orange County or the Inland Empire (ugh). It's just that the boosters of "The Valley's Miracle Mile" ought to do a little research before making silly comparisons.

The businesses of Encino Commons have every right to beautify and promote their retail district, of course, so here's some alternate slogans they can use:

ENCINO COMMONS - The Valley's Encino Commons

ENCINO COMMONS - You're Not In Sherman Oaks Yet

ENCINO COMMONS - This is a Really Neat Sign

ENCINO COMMONS - If You're Reading This, You Should Be Watching The Road

If you happen to stumble upon "The Valley's Little Tokyo" or "The Valley's Highland Park" or "The Valley's Venice," please let the Militant know!

The Militant Goes To The Valley

The Militant paid a visit to the San Fernando Valley for the first time since inaugurating this here blog. Yes, the Militant drove his car this time, because one of the purposes had something to with routine auto maintenance in North Hills (kind of hard to do if you didn't bring your car), and also the transport of unspecified Militant cargo to a destination in the foothills of Encino later that evening. But all was consistent with the Militant's "Car-Lite" rules; the trip was over 10 miles from home, so it warranted auto travel. Besides, the entire trip was still conscious of saving gas and mileage as the Militant, having had the Encino destination on his calendar for over a month, purposely scheduled the North Hills appointment on the same day to avoid taking multiple trips to The Valley, thus accomplishing the goal of saving gas, mileage and money.

Though many have ridiculed or disdained The Valley as some suburban wasteland, the Militant has an admitted sentimental fondness to it, for personal reasons. Though the Militant has never lived in the 818, and has never planned on living there, given a choice between The Valley, the SGV, The IE or the Antelope Valley, The Militant would choose the 818 in a heartbeat. Say what you will about The Valley, it still has way more flavor than the Inland Empire will ever have. The Militant would even rather live in The Valley than in the Westside...(At least The Valley has mass transit...).

On this July Wednesday, the temperature in the 91343 zip code area was a scorching 95 degrees. The Militant, while waiting for his car maintenance, and stuck at a waiting room without a complete newspaper nor a notebook to write on, decided to take a walk outside. So he left the air-conditioned confines of the unspecified auto dealership waiting room and crossed Sepulveda Blvd, walking past the cars stopped at the intersection with their air conditioner systems buzzing and whirring loudly. The Militant wanted to do what the Militant usually does when he takes a walk to an unfamiliar place: mapping. The Militant's stroll through The Community Formerly Known As Sepulveda yielded a taco joint here, a Mexican mariscos restaurant there, an old-school minimall, a new-school minimall, a Panda Express with a drive-thru, another minimall. After barely a block, the Militant decided it was too damn hot to walk any further...and headed back. Crossing Sepulveda again, a large Coca-Cola billboard loomed not too far up the street. Aimed to those who habla español, the billboard read, "¿Tienes Sed?" (Are you thirsty?), and the little voice in the Militant's head (the same one that told him to start this here blog) said, "Si!"

But The Militant realized something during his two-block walk: Compared to the sidewalks on The Other Side Of The Hill, they're wider, cleaner and in much better condition...yet no one walks in The Valley (save for Downtown Burbank, NoHo Arts District, Toluca Lake, Ventura Blvd in ShOaks and that little stretch of Reseda by Cal State Northridge). Perhaps The Valley should just give the sidewalks in the remainder of the area to Hollywood, Silver_Lake, Koreatown, Echo Park or The Real Eastside. I mean, it's not like the rest of the Valley folks really use 'em.

But 'tis true, The Valley is sprawling, where after the car maintenance, The Militant made an attempt to visit one of his operatives who works at a store on Reseda, south of Nordhoff. But the store was hard to locate for some reason (the pressure of traffic made it hard to slow down) and the mission was aborted, so the Militant headed straight to his Encino destination. That whole trek was 14 miles -- roughly the same distance from Downtown Los Angeles to Santa Monica Beach! The Valley (345 square miles) can easily fit the entire nation of Singapore (292 square miles) with room to spare.

But The Militant will visit The Valley again before the summer ends - If biking by the beach during the day is his #1 summertime joy, then biking at night in The Valley is #2. The weather is perfect, the streets are nice and wide, there's no traffic. The Valley really feels like a different place when you explore it like that. The Militant also longs for those nights when the Santa Anas make the palm trees of The Valley sway crazily, causing their fronds to bristle against each other hard enough that it makes a soothing sound not unlike that of the surf.

Like, fer sure.