Right On Target: The Militant Takes On City Target in DTLA

Back in the day, a Target store was considered an only-in-the-suburbs phenomenon, usually anchoring a big-ass parking lot lined by palm trees, and accompanied by a Lowe's, with an Outback Steakhouse, a Chick Fil-A and a Claim Jumper thrown in for good measure. Bonus points if it has a Hometown Buffet (though in that case, substitute the Target with a Wal-Mart).

Now, not only has the world changed, but our metropolitan area has changed. We actually have a Downtown now, and people are actually living in it (including a few of you readers). Five years ago, you Downtown Folk got a Ralphs supermarket, which was like a massively groundbreaking moment, remember? The seas parted, the earth shook and you could just walk down the street for some groceries.

The Target department store chain eventually wised up to all this and opened up a City Target store in Downtown last week. Slightly smaller, yet featuring much of the same stuff you'll find at a suburban Target (sans lawn/porch-related items).

The Militant went to take a gander at this new phenomenon, and bought some stuff too.

City Target's "City Love" section, full of Los Angeles-centric items.

Yes, it looks pretty much indistinguishable from any other Target store, except it's so damn clean and orderly (it's a new store, duh). There was a section near the entrance called "City Love" that sold Los Angeles (and not "LA" in fact) t-shirts, mugs, refrigerator magnets and other trinkets. From a Militant perspective it was...interesting, but overall a nice effort on the civic pride front. Of course, the Fontana Target won't have any "Fontana" t-shirts.

DTLA's second supermarket!

The grocery section was smaller, yet no less complete. Hey yo Downtowners, another supermarket for y'allz! Sure it's no Trader Joe's, but it's gonna have to do for now, huh?

The Militant ended up buying some cheap shades, because he was fearing he was being recognized lately.

When he was done, he got a nice, friendly, upbeat-yet-not-too-forced-and-hokey attitude from the redshirts (i.e. Target employees). Let's see how long that lasts, but they seemed aite.

One thing, though, that was not alright was...the lack of bicycle parking.  Grrrr.

Dude, this is Downtown. CicLAfreakingvia happened right outside its doors two weekends ago.

No bike parking facilities. Whatup wit dat?!

The Militant didn't need to park his bike here since he rode the Metro, and City Target is right across the street from the 7th/Metro Center (M) Red/Purple/Blue/Expo station. But he's sure others would need to. One cyclist just used a "Passenger Loading Only" sign (pictured above) as a locking post, which is technically illegal, (yet never enforced). But let this be a Militant appeal to the City Target folks: The Militant knows you're trying your best to fit in the center of the City. Being transit-accessible, that's awesomesauce, and The Militant salutes you folks for that alone, But...them bikes are here to stay, so please City Target, It's not too late to add a few bike racks right near the front entrance!

OHPLEASEOHPLEASEOHPLEASE!!!

Well, well, well. The Militant heard today that the great almighty Midwestern colonial slavemaster of the Los Angeles Times, a.k.a., the Tribune Company, is writing a new chapter in its corporate history: Chapter 11!

The big Trib, which owns, among other properties, the Times, KTLA Channel 5, amd perennial losers the Chicago Cubs, about $12 million in debt.

Tribune is expected to zell-off the Cubbies sometime next year, and good for them. Perhaps the MLB's sultans of suck will reduce their suckage factor somewhat by eliminating the suckitude from their ownership end (As far as on the field, well, they're on their own).

Tribune also needs to zell-off the Los Angeles Times, and basically any media entity west of the Mississippi for that matter. And what's this about Tribune buying the Orange County Register and the San Diego Union-Tribune (WTF? A continuous zone of journalistic suckitude from Pt. Mugu to the Mexican Border?)

The Militant knows Sam Zell himself isn't reading this, since he doesn't get the whole blog thing to begin with, but what the hey:

Sam Zell: Dude...Duuuuude. Duuuuuuude. Please oh please oh please oh PLEASE emancip, er, sell the Los Angeles Times. You don't need it. It's not working. Really. And in case you don't know, us Southern Californians are all...umm, illiterate! Yeah, that's the ticket! So why own a newspaper that no one can read? Really. So zell off the Times. To Mr. Geffen. Heck, zell it to a goldfish. The Militant would gladly buy it, though he doesn't quite have the militant funds to afford such a venture. But if he did, he'd show up at your door with the cash.

And as for buying up papers in OC and SD? STOP. YOU'RE DOING IT WRONG. You don't keep buying crap when you're in debt. Isn't that the reason why there's a mortgage crisis going on right now? Please, zell off the Times, and don't buy the other So Cal papers either.

Again, zell off the Los Angeles Times.

Do it, please.

PLEEEEEAAAAASE!!!

Local Music Store Hearts Huckabee?

While StormWatch 2008 has been keeping the Militant from much of his reconnaissance missions, Decision 2008 has been the talk of the town - not just in Iowa and New Hampshire, but much more locally.

Aside from our City Council President and City Controller stumping for last week's Iowa Caucus Democratic winner, it seems at least one local business appears to be giving props to last week's GOP winner - or at least is riding on some free Mike Huckabee publicity.

Local music store chain West L.A. Music, with stores in Universal City and in...West Los Angeles (duh) recently splashed a pic of the bass guitar-playing Arkansas Republican posing with store staff on its website. The site also displayed an audio link and transcript of American Public Media's Weekend America radio show segment on Huckabee, which followed him on the campaign trail and featured the candidate (gratuitously?) mentioning the store by name when the topic suddenly shifts to music:

"McCartney was more innovative. Entwistle had a more traditional concept of the bass. But McCartney was the most innovative bass player of that era. He really was. And let me tell you this: I was in Los Angeles and I got to play John Entwistle's actual Thunderbird bass. It's at the West LA Music Company, and Don Griffin, the guy who owns that store, owns that guitar. And so he pulls it out, and I got to play on that guitar that he played on all The Who's earlier stuff."

"Mitt Romney will never play that guitar," I said.

Huckabee smiled. "If he did, he probably wouldn't play all that well."

With a month to go before the California Primary election, is this pretty much the store's endorsement of Huckabee? Or is it just cashing in on the election?

One thing's for sure, West L.A. Music's primary competitor, the Guitar Center music store chain (founded here in Southern California), most likely would not heart Huckabee, as the borg-like chain was recently purchased by the Massachusetts-based Bain Capital - a company founded by...this guy.

Of course, former governors with presidential ambitions displaying their musical talents on television is not a new concept. So maybe for his own sake, Mitt might want to pick up the bass himself.

Who knows? Perhaps the Republican nomination might be ultimately decided by a game of Guitar Hero.

Yet Another Pinkberry-Related Los Angeles Blog Entry. Wheee!!!

Yes, this Militant is not above getting bitten by the Pinkberry bug. Yes, the whole fro-yo Cold War has been detailed several times over. Yes, this Militant has sampled competitors CeFiore and Kiwiberri (but not yet Yogotango, Roseberry, Mr. Snowberry, Berri Good, Chuckberry, Berri Gordy or Halleberri) but frankly I don't care. When the weather is warm, frozen yogurt, by any other name, really hits the spot (and so does ice cream, but I'll get to that in a future entry...). So I couldn't help it if there's a spankin' new P'berry on the northwestern fringe of Silver_Lake (underscore added to remind all the gentro-hipsters out there that it's actually spelled as two words) on Hyperion and Rowena (which is technically in Los Feliz due to the location of the community sign, but since there's already a P'berry in Los Feliz, I'll let this one slide). Everyone in both the Traditional Media and the Blogosphere has talked in detail about the flavor or content of the yogurt, whether it is actual yogurt, the choice of toppings or which nonfat frozen yogurt (NFY) chain is the best.

I'm here to talk about those stupid overpriced trinkets on sale on the P'berry shelves.

Unlike competitor CeFiore, P'berry makes no claims as to being Italian-style NFY, but for some reason they thought selling colored plastic trinkets from Italian design firm Alessi was cool. Gee, I dunno. Yes, they look neat on static display but that's about it. I don't think paying $69.00 for a stupid dog bowl is what I have in mind when craving some original flavor NFY topped with strawberries, mangoes and almonds on a warm summer day. I don't even think my dog would care if I did. But hooray for gratuitous consumerism, eh? During my P'berry visit today, a preschool-aged kid quietly begged his mom to get him a "Cico," a little blue alien-looking guy in a baseball cap holding a spoon. The store staff told the mom that they were out of stock, but the child was persistent and the mom relented. She even got the manager out and asked if she could buy the display model. The manager let her, and got a box to package it in. All this for $15 extra. All this while the NFY line was being held up. Turns out "Cico" is actually, according to the Alessi site, an "Egg cup with salt castor and spoon." Wow. I guess egg cups are really the in-thing with kids these days. And here I thought it was Dora the Explorer, Spongebob Squarepants or even Nintendo Wii. Looks like my four-year-old goddaughter down in San Diego is getting an egg cup this Christmas!

Maybe I'm a little too cynical. Some of those Alessi trinkets might actually be practical. I can get a small colored container and instead of ordering having cereal toppings on my P'berry, I can just go BYO Fruity Pebbles! Then again, some of those trinkets, in my Militant opinion, border on being racist.

Now some Silver_Lakers, whether longtime residents or gentro-hipsters, have lamented that P'berry represents a dangerous venture into the "corporatization" of New Ivanhoe. I guess having a Trader Joe's must really bother them, or even having not one, but two 7-Elevens. Besides, if these folks are as progressive as they claim to be, surely they would welcome a minority- and female- owned company, right?

Besides, 10 years from now when people in Podunk get into the NFY craze, you know where it all began.

Over The Hilton

So as I savored my P'berry, I spotted a Mistubishi Outlander in the tiny mini-mall parking lot (I rode my bike, no parking worries for me!) driving off onto Hyperion with the words "FREE PARIS!" painted on the rear window. Yeah, how nice. I mean I would totally agree with that sentiment...during the Nazi occupation. I guess one attention whore begets another.

Bain Gets Guitarded

Wetlake Village-based music store chain Guitar Center was sold today for $2.1 billion to Boston-based private equity firm Bain Capital Partners, LLC (Republican presidential candidate Mitt Romney is one of its founding partners). GC, or as this very musically-inclined Militant calls it, "Guitard Center," is the largest musical instrument company in America and began here in Hollywood, across the street from its current location on Sunset Blvd's guitar row. Speaking of which, the reason for such a plethora of pickin' points of purchase? Guitar pioneer Les Paul once lived in the Sunset-Gardner neighborhood and several guitar companies wanted to be in close proximity to his lab.

Though GC is a popular subject of ridicule for the Militant elsewhere on the net, I lament the loss of yet another Southern California-based firm selling out to our East Coast colonizers, and this just makes me mad. DO WE !@#$% OWN ANYTHING ANYMORE?

Oh well, at least we still got Pinkberry.